


Trust

by Threshie



Category: Marvel
Genre: Bottom Peter Parker, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Time, M/M, MattPeter, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Underage, Peter is 19 here, Smut, Top Matt Murdock, spideydevil, this is NOT about MCU teenage Peter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-08
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2018-10-29 12:07:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10853676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Threshie/pseuds/Threshie
Summary: Matt's finally ready to let another person close to him again, but is Peter?





	Trust

"Nnnn..." Peter bit back a moan as Matt slowly pressed into him, shivering. He had wrapped his legs up around the redhead's shoulders like it was nothing to bend so far, but he was definitely a little nervous, clutching at the sheets.

Resisting the urge to push further, Matt leaned down close to the teen's face and kissed him softly instead. Peter had never done this before — he had to take it slowly. Gently.

"Relax into it," he murmured against the younger man's soft mouth. Everything about Peter was pleasant, but Matt especially loved his lips. He leaned forward more, pressing another kiss to them. Peter lay his head back on the pillow and parted his lips, welcoming Matt to deepen the kiss further.

He tasted like mint. The shy way he moved his tongue to meet Matt's took the redhead's breath away. He was so innocent.

Matt moved a hand to rest close to the teen's face, stroking his cheek. Peter was pressing back into the kiss almost desperately now, his body trembling beneath Matt's. They couldn't slow down for much longer.

Keeping the teen's mouth captive with his own, he angled his hips and entered fully. The sensation drew a moan from Peter, who broke off the kiss at last to turn his head to one side. He was shaking. Matt held him, stroked the side of his neck with a palm. Was he in pain? If it really was the first time, he probably was. 

"Peter," he whispered, now a bit breathless himself. When the teen turned his head to look up, Matt leaned down until their foreheads touched, still stroking his neck. "Are you okay?"

Peter said nothing, but nodded a tiny bit against him. He was still panting.

"Please d-don't stop," he managed after a moment.

Relieved to hear him say anything, Matt responded by reaching a hand up to one of the teen's that clutched at the bedsheet beside his head. The redhead laced their fingers and held his hand tightly, leaning down for another deep kiss as he slowly began to move his hips.

"Nn..." The whimper from Peter was immediate, and he squeezed Matt's hand tightly in return. Like any pain was a challenge, he opened his legs wider and kissed the redhead passionately, shuddering each time Matt pushed into him.

It felt so good that it was hard to stop himself, but Matt did. Aroused as he was, Peter was definitely in pain — the redhead's senses couldn't miss it. He stopped and kissed the teen again very gently, pulling away from him to sit up. Peter held his hand tightly still, staying where he was.

"W-why..." Why were the they stopping, he was probably about to ask. Moving the brunette's legs down from his shoulders, Matt leaned forward again just long enough to kiss Peter's chest and smiled.

"It's okay, we're just moving. Trust me," he murmured, taking the younger man's shoulders and helping him sit up. For somebody usually so loud-mouthed, Peter was amazingly submissive in bed; he let Matt guide him from laying on his back to facing away on his knees without a word of protest. He was trembling even more than before. 

Placing a hand between his shoulders, Matt gently pushed him forward to rest his head on the pillow, his arms folded in front of him. It stretched his slender waist out beautifully; the redhead ran his palms up along the teen's sides, enjoying the way he shivered in response. Moving up behind Peter, he positioned himself and pressed inside again, keeping a hand on the teen's back.

"Ahh...!" Peter moaned, arching under his hand. Pushing deeply into him, Matt bent over his back and kissed the back of his neck, moving his hips. The brunette gave a little cry and clutched the sheets near his face, gasping.

"Feel better?" Matt whispered, still kissing his neck.

Trembling, Peter managed to reply, "Y...yes..." Matt didn't sense any signs of pain from him now. He was relaxing his body, opening up, and he seemed overwhelmed with pleasure. 'Better' didn't seem like a strong enough word.

"Good." Matt leaned over him further and slipped his fingers through the teen's soft hair, letting his hips start a steady rhythm. Peter's little gasps and squirms at that were beautiful. He arched his back again, and Matt rewarded him with a trail of kisses along the side of his neck. The brunette moaned and half-buried his face in the pillow, gasping hard. His body was making the most exquisite little shivers with each thrust.

"M-Matt," he begged. "Please..."

Slipping an arm around the teen's slender waist, Matt pulled him back up onto his knees without breaking their connection. Peter tried to sit up onto his arms, too, but the redhead pressed between his shoulders again, getting him to lean forward.

"Ohhh..." The shuddery gasp made it clear to Matt that the angle was better this way. He leaned over Peter, an arm still around his waist, and ran his hand over the brunette's toned stomach, then lower. His fingertips brushed through soft hair before running over heated skin. Peter gave a ragged gasp at the hand suddenly wrapped around him, pressing himself hard against Matt's hips.

He was already on the edge. Matt could hear his heart racing, feel every little muscle tensing and shaking. The brunette was making tiny whimpers without realizing it, and moving his hips to meet each thrust.

Matt ran his thumb lightly over the length in his hand, stroking the tip. He was getting close, himself. Peter responded so well to everything that it urged him on — and this time was no different. The lightest stroke had him gasping hard, crumpling the bedsheets with both hands.

"M-Matt- I-I can't-" He managed. Even that came out halfway moaned. Matt gripped him firmly and moved his hand up and down in time with his thrusts, gasping against his neck. They came together that way, Peter shuddering and gasping pleas into the pillow. Matt blanked it all out for a moment, the world a blur of pleasure.

The next moment he was aware of, he was sliding himself out and crawling down beside Peter on the bed, wrapping an arm around him. He was drenched in sweat — they both were — and the scent of him filled the air, intoxicating. Matt turned toward the teen more, holding him and pressing his face to the side of Peter's neck, breathing him in. It had been so long since he had had this — a lover he could trust. One that trusted him. One he actually loved.

Peter's breathing was what snapped him out of his bliss. Short, hitching breaths. Crying.

"Peter?" He whispered, moving a hand up to rest gently on the teen's hair. Touching their foreheads, he felt his brows furrow in concern. "I didn't hurt you, did I...?" He had been so sure that Peter wasn't in pain. Why the tears? Was he just overwhelmed?

"N...no," came the tearful reply. Peter brought a shaky hand up to cover Matt's on his face. "I-I'm sorry, it's...it's n-not you."

Pulling him closer to hold, the redhead kissed his cheek and rubbed his back gently.

"I'm sorry it hurt at first. It's normal for the first time — it'll pass."

That drew a tiny whimper from the brunette in his arms.

"M-Matt, this...it's not the f-first time."

"What?" Matt would have glanced down at him if he could see the teen's expression. Did he lie about it? Was he feeling guilty? "You told me that you had never had sex before," he said, speaking evenly and softly. Getting angry wouldn't do any good. Virginity really didn't matter much to him, anyway; it was more the thought that Peter would lie to him about such a thing that got to him.

"Not l-like this." The brunette was crying again. He trembled against Matt's chest. "He just d...did things to me. S-sorry, I should've told you. I'm sorry..."

Matt's arms tightened around the younger man at that. Was Peter saying what he thought he was saying?

"Peter," he said carefully, "did somebody hurt you?"

Peter quieted suddenly, save for the occasional tiny sob. He nodded against Matt's chest.

"I, um. I-I had this friend in school who was older than me," he said quietly. "H-he invited me to his house one night, and started s-showing me dirty pictures, and...said he wanted to do that with me. H-he was 16, I was too scared to try to leave..." He began to cry again softly.

Matt held him close, stroking his back. 

"How old were you?"

"Eleven." Peter sighed shakily. "H-he really hurt me, so I was nervous when you...when we decided to do this. I-I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"Don't," Matt whispered, trying not to hold him so tightly. It was hard not to; he was upset by what he was hearing. The last thing he wanted to do was to hurt Peter, though, even by accident. He moved a hand from the younger man's back to gently touch his face, wipe away a few of the tears. "I-I'm sorry that I brought back those memories for you. We didn't have to...you can always tell me no, I don't need any reason why."

"I-I wanted to," Peter assured him, sniffling softly again. He pressed closer to Matt, nuzzling his face against the redhead's neck, and gave a shaky sigh. "Sorry I ruined it. D-didn't want it to be about...this..."

"It's about you and I," Matt replied gently, wrapping both arms around him again. Peter's skin was so smooth under his fingers. The teen wasn't coated in scars like him. "Nothing's ruined...I admire how brave you are."

"Brave?" Peter asked tearfully, shivering against him. Matt turned his head to kiss his hair gently.

"You're very brave, Peter. You didn't have to tell me all of this, but you did anyway."

The brunette began to cry again softly.

"I-I'm not...I just..."

"Shh. Just don't feel guilty," Matt soothed, stroking his back. "I love you, Peter. This doesn't change that. Okay?"

"M-Matt..." The teen sobbed, struggling to sit up and pull away from his grip. Matt let go of him easily, but kept both hands on his shoulders. He stayed there on his back on the bed, focusing on the way his senses painted Peter in front of him. The younger man sucked in a deep breath, clearing his throat and trying again. "Matt. Y-you just said you love me."

Matt smiled up at him a bit sadly.

"I did. I do," he added. "That's all I actually came here to do tonight — to tell you that. If anything I did hurt you, I-"

Peter silenced him with a kiss. Surprised, Matt slipped an arm around his shoulders, drawing him down slowly and pressing back against his lips. Rather than lay down beside him again, the brunette settled onto his chest, kissing him several more times before tucking his head under Matt's chin. Gently, the redhead ran one hand over his back, the other slipping through his hair.

"I-I love you, too," Peter whispered, his breath warm and soft against Matt's neck. He was still trembling.

Matt held him close. His feelings for Peter were overwhelming. It was hard to put them into words. 'Love' didn't feel like saying enough — the brunette was part of his life. He hadn't let anyone in for a long time, not like this. Peter had to have felt so vulnerable to let Matt even touch him after what had happened before, and yet he had trusted him.

"I won't let anyone hurt you again," he promised.

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by some old comic scans revealing that Peter is a survivor of sexual assault in the canon. I also kind of like the idea that Spidey's a total loudmouth otherwise, but shy in bed. Writing from Matt's blind-but-superpowered point of view is always interesting, too. In case anybody missed the tags, Peter is 19 here and it's 616 Peter, not MCU Peter.
> 
> Anyway... *Hides face* I can count the number of smut scenes I've EVER written on my hands — please be gentle with your criticism. It took two YEARS to get the guts up to post this fic; I wrote it in early 2015. Since it is a one-shot and I'm getting back into regularly posting my writing, I figured I may as well post it and let others enjoy it if they like Spideydevil (there's not enough Spideydevil out there!) I'm clumsily trying to practice writing sex scenes again this year. Any feedback on the smut part of this is appreciated, good or bad, just please be gentle... =/


End file.
